The Falling Tower of Babel

Unforgiven

Image from: http://www.thevillageoffice.co.uk/photoalbum/gallery/photo14a-gallery-dawn_ullswater_cumbria_06-08-05.jpg

In the day, I tremble, anxious and broken.

In the night, I sleep with the image of your bleeding mouth spilling into my hands.

The distance has made me weary, weak, provoked me to an anger which I could not convey… My child, to the one who has wronged you.

Pained you.

And as I stand before your grave, hungry for your breathing flesh upon mine, I could not wallow in grief… cannot scream out my pain.

For my little one, I cannot give relief to the murderous retch that stole you from my arms.

Retch! I shall give you no peace!

I, cannot give myself peace….

-ANDRES-

To My Judas Iscariot

wikipainitings: ” The Arrest of Christ (Kiss of Judas) La Cattura di Cristo (bacio di Giuda)”

You walk with me a thousand miles my friend,

only to sell me like cattle in the end.

I loved you the first time I saw you,

but knew you’d betray me the first sight of silver or gold.

My friend, I wait here.

Nailed to the cross you have scorn me.

Silently thinking of our time, happily spent.

My memory bind me to you,

even as the mob below me scream for my death.

Oddly, I find solice in my thoughts of you.

My friend, will you hang yourself for me?

Drown yourself in guilt as my lifeless body lay upon my mother’s lap,

tears soaking her cheeks?

My friend, I wish you no harm.

I am stricken by pain at the image of your broken body hanging from a tree.

Do not fear me for I can do you no harm, more than any ghost mourning the living.

I love you my Friend, but in the end you loved yourself more than you loved me.

My friend, my Judas Iscariot.

-ANDRES-

PAIN

I feel pain in my joints, as I lay in my bed dreaming.

I feel pain in my chest, as I remember something is missing.

I feel pain inside my ribs, tight and constricting.

I feel pain in my head, throbbing feels like something is bleeding.

I feel pain in my arms, my hands tremble and unfeeling.

I feel pain in in my eyes, for the thousand tears I’ve been shedding.

I feel pain.

For you, who I have lost and will always be loving.

“IN LOVING MEMORY OF BEAUTIFUL HANNAH”

-ANDRES-

ILLNESS

I sleep in the darkness of my room plagued by the weakness of my limbs and the aching of my spine.

My lips parched, throat dry and stiff from hunger.

I cannot call to anyone.

I lay, staring at the nothingness of my room. My mind filled with the horror and fear of tomorrow.

A prisoner of this bed, filled with the stench of sweat and urine.

I pray God, take me.

Tightness grips my chest, my lungs grasp for air as I fill my vain with flame. The venom of my salvation flows in me… finally.

I wait.

My eyes dim, fingers grasped upon the tiny needle of my freedom from my torment.

I imagine that this tiny hole in my arm which paved the way to salvation, shall fester, and grow… for homes to maggot and flies.

Freedom.

Hate

I hate the world I live in.

I hate it everyday.

Just like a dreadful dream.

Filled with bitterness and dismay.

I hate the world I live in.

Like I was dust in a dirt ashtray.

Fueled by painful memories.

Struggling to keep myself at bay.

I hate the world I live in.

Because I could never convey.

That I was haunted by demons.

That I could never slay.

-Andres-

My Heart

                                              (note image from wordpress.com)

                                                        My heart is broken.

                                                    So much that I feel pain.

                                                  So much that I cant breath.

                                                     So much that I cant see.

                                                         My heart is broken.

                                                      And I can’t tell you why.

                                               Because the world will deny you.

                                                    People will condemn you.

                                                       And put you to harm.

                                                         My heart is broken.

                                                         Coz I just can’t say.

                                                                -Andres-

“All hope abandon ye who enter here.”

-Inferno Dante’s Divine Comedy-

Forsaken

I stand on the road of nothingness, staring into a blank distant darkness.

No whimsical conversations to entertain me, no echoing footsteps beside me.

I stand on the road of nothingness, staring into a blank distant darkness.

No cheerful laughter to calm me, no concerned shoulders to advice me.

I stand on the road of nothingness, staring into a blank distant darkness.

No soft whispers to guide me, no warm hand to soothe me.

I stand on the road of nothingness, staring into a blank distant darkness.

No one to protect me, no one to save me.

I enter the road of nothingness, engulfed by a blank distant darkness.

-Andres-